Fast and effective ways to separate with a man you still love

 We will all agree that separation is the most painful thing in a relationship of two that have been built with a purpose to last. no one wants to be apart from someone they hoped would live their lives together until the end. In some cases, though separation is the only option no matter how strong the love and feelings are towards each other and of course people deal with separation differently from others. In this post, I will mainly focus on those that might not know what to do in order to stay strong and forget the person and the relationship altogether. If you have difficulty and are frustrated about dealing with your separation below are a few pointers on how to let go and move on if separation is the only option

1. You are your own

person

remember that you are a different person and you deserve better and what suits your style and opinions about the type of a partner you want to have and that you owe no one explanation or pity when it comes to your priorities and maintaining who you are.  You are you and you need what fits you. you have your standards and you won't bother settling for less. when you accept what does not suit your type of person you have unconsciously told yourself that you are worthless. so the best thing is to be your own person and go with what works for you.

2. Cut them off

You need to stop communicating with the person at all cost, I mean from WhatsApp, Facebook and Instagram, unfriend them and block them from all social media accounts and even from your direct line, delete or keep somewhere safe where you won't go easily whatever that you do not feel like throwing away I mean that t-shirt or watch that the person might have gotten you or those pictures that even when you are no longer together you might wanna have in the near future as a remembrance.

stop tALKING TO THE PERSON AVOID PLACES THAT HE NORMALLY GOES OR MIGHT have GONE WITH YOU, AVOID HIS FRIENDS OR YOUR MUTUAL FRIENDS, if it happens that you meet some of his never ever ask of him. if they tell you something bad or nice about him say wow ok .. sorry to hear that or .... nice to hear that, then change the conversation and talk about things that relate to his friend, then tell them it was meeting them again. never tell them how you feel whether good or bad, because really it is not their problem, the problem here is for you to forget your ex so you do not want to be talking about him at all.

3. Be real with yourself

You may love the person but then be real to yourself about the reasons why it needs to end fill your heart with the truth of the matter and situation of your relationship. meditate and tell yourself the truth and face the facts of the relationship and why it really needs to end and how the purpose of it is not serving you right anymore. being honest with yourself is advised because you are the one that knows the good and the bad of the situation of your relationship.

4. Never give him a chance to talk

You decided for a reason leave him, don't allow him to talk you out of your decision , because the decision was made while he was there and no matter how he says he will change it should not matter when he still wants you together, he may as well give himself time to change while not with you and get back to you when he has changed some of the things that you do not like about him.  do not listen to him cry, or beg do not give him a chance to talk because you are a decisive person and you make your decision based on the fact that you know yourself and what you want, so if he isn't what you want why waste time, cause he is to obligated to be what you want.

5. Do not be friends

You are over now, being friends after a relationship is a form of cowardice because you both are afraid of the real pain of separation so you both wanna remain friends so that you do not have to suffer a loss if you want to face your demons, its start by refusing to be friends and end it let it be as if he never knew you, that way you will have all the time to feel the real pain of separation and overcome it and heal completely. 

6. Go out

I do not mean go out to meet guys or be with the first guy that you meet but am saying move on with your life, go back to your old hobbies before you met him, or better still create new ones. Be with friends have a life of your own and learn to spoil yourself, do not be afraid to flirt with that handsome guy at the. allow males to admire you or buy you a drink, Take good care of yourself, I mean from making your hair to making your nails and going to the gym or something. Look for something that will keep your mind occupied and yourself busy.

7. Never sleep with him

Once is over be forward about that and set boundaries, do not allow him ever tough you or treat you like a second class, When the relationship ends, those kisses end that sex ends and those late night calls and camera calls ends, so be sure to make that clear, He has no right to come to your place unannounced. He becomes automatically a stranger to you.

I know these steps may seem very mean but remember they are for your own sanity and you need to follow them up because your healing and surviving the pains of the breakup depends on them and your firmness. remember you separated for a reason and the reason still stands. love yourself enough to let go of anything that troubles you, why bother when the world has billions of people to associate with. do not kill yourself over a broken glass pack it, throw it in the trash and make another tea with an unbroken and clean cup. You owe that to yourself .